The Crew Goes to UW Homecoming 2008, Ridiculousness Ensues

That always terrible lingering hangover is finally gone, and I've gotten a chance to sort out some of the happenings from my amazingly great weekend in Madison, WI. The whole crew was back, all 6 roommates, Big Bro, Lil Bro#2, a great group of lady-friends, a wife, a girlfriend...and supporting his Illini on the road, Whetst1.

There were many reasons for this to be a great weekend: it was UW Homecoming, my first time back in the Midwest in a while, the first time all 6 roommates were back in Madtown at one time, and a weekend full of 4 different birthdays to celebrate. After pickling our brains in alcohol for two solid days, the stories could go on forever. So I've decided to shorten it to a tally of events, and let you, the loyal F&BT readers, use your imaginations...

2: # of days in Madison
9: the number of bars we visited over two days, not counting repeat visits
1: amazing tailgate put on by my parents and aunt & uncle, including birthday cake
3: the number of times I went to The KK (fake one) this weekend
2: the number of times I went to The KK (fake one) in my entire college career. Why the difference? I honestly have no idea, but everyone seemed to be going there this weekend. And it was shot-tastic fun every single time.
1: Heisman Trophy winner seen at the KK (and his fullback from back in the day too!)

2: number of nights I ate Ian's Pizza late-night

2: number of nights I randomly ran into CJ while heading to/from Ian's

2: number of stories told about Muskrat at dinner Friday after his girlfriend (who was visiting/meeting us for the first time) asked for college stories about him

947: number of stories about Muskrat that couldn't be told at dinner, or in front of his girlfriend...ever.

1: unfortunate attempt at "Extreme Walking" by Fuzz and I

2: total number of face-plants we took before deciding our "Extreme Walking" prime was behind us

1: inappropriate dinner eaten at a way-too-nice-for-hoodies-and-baseball-hats restaurant by the crew

8: bottles of wine at said dinner

4: number of times I started to cry from laughter at dinner

3: number of times Fuzz had to have a conversation with himself so that dinner didn't come back up

547: number of "Your balls are ready at the bar!" jokes made by Lallycakes at dinner

2: number of phones lost this weekend

1: number of co-ed beds slept in by an alumni this weekend
1: number of times an alumni wet a co-ed's bed this weekend
1: number of iPhones ruined from being urinated on while in a co-ed's bed
2: bushes napped in outside a bar by a roommate during the game
3: number of roommates that actually went into the game, and made it to the family tailgate afterwards
1: number of roommates who still can't remember where they slept on Saturday

Overall, I'd say it was a great weekend. And if this tally didn't prove it, I have backup proof. My company made me take a "Health Assessment" today at work so they can control our Health Insurance costs. Coming off a weekend like this, the chances of me passing the "Alcohol Assessment" portion of the test fell somewhere between slim and Purdue's bowl hopes. Sure enough, this is what it spit out...."You reported an alcohol drinking pattern that would be of concern."

The "of concern" part was legit in bold. Well, no shit health assessment. I went to UW. At least I passed on part of the checkup...

"Congratulations on always wearing your seatbelt!" Damn right. See you guys next year in Madison for Homecoming '09!

Homecoming 2008 Awards!

Least Valuable Player: Tobnuts. MIA the entire weekend...and he lives in Madison.

Most Valuable Player: Whetst1. Not only did he come up to support his Illini, but he held his own with the young'ins all weekend. Plus, he had to sit next to me all game and listen to me yell "The Juice is LOOSE!" after every one of his picks. Props, Whetst1.

Runner-up: Fuzz. The weekend stories are never as good without him in them.

Most Ridiculous: Kenny G. He didn't pull out the fake saxaphone playing, but pretty much all his antics made up for it. Not bad for a lil' guy.

MY BOY! 2 Simple Rules for Picking a Favorite New Player

A little over a year ago, I was sitting in a Badger bar in Chicago, IL with my roommate Fuzz getting mentally prepared for the second UW football game of the 2007 season. We had already seen one week's worth of game film on the Badgers and had some sort of idea what the team would look like. But that wasn't enough, we needed someone to cheer for more than the star players. We both hated PJ Hill, so he was out. Tyler Donovan didn't inspire tons of confidence. We needed a player to call our own, to ride out the highs and lows with, and to cheer for with unbridled obnoxiousness. We created...MY BOY!

MY BOY! isn't a new concept. People have been doing it for a while, we just happened to give it a name and take it to a new level. There are rules for choosing your boy are simple, and have been developed over many a fine drink:

1) MY BOY! has to be a new contributor. Youth is served with your boy. Pick them as a young contributor and watch as they grow into a great player. Your boy can't be a proven player. Anyone expected to be an all-american, or a returning team leader is not to be considered. He has to play some, offense, defense or special teams, and he can be a starter. But he has to be a freshman or a new contributor.

2) MY BOY! sticks as your boy for as long as he is with the team. Highs and lows...he's your boy. If you picked him young, and he happens to become a heisman candidate...congratulations. Rub it in everyone's face. If he fumbles in the big game or misses a tackle that goes for a touchdown...he's your boy. Defend him to no end.

So there we were, sitting in Redmond's...picking our boy. Fuzz went with Aaron Henry. Freshman DB out of Florida, good wheels, solid recruiting buzz, and big enough to hold his own as a freshman. Myself, I went with David Gilreath #85. Freshman WR from MN, short, quick, and a dangerous return man. Neither figured to start at the beginning of the season, but both figured to see some PT. This turned out to be a fantastic idea! Right off the bat it started paying dividends. MY BOY! Gilreath was returning the opening kickoff...

"MY BOY #85 TO THE HOUSE!"

This turned out to be an every game phrase for me...numerous times per game.

So there you go, the rules for creating MY BOY! Rules are obviously subject to change, and all recommendations are welcome. But these first two should get you started. As we enter into Big Ten play this week, F&BT highly encourages you to gather with your friends...indulge in a few libations...and pick your boy! Cheer him on with unabashed passion. Scream for him at quiet times during the game. Make ridiculous predictions about the great play he is about to make.

Use the comments...and tell us who's MY BOY! for you.